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Friday, November 7, 2008

Showtime Allstar Wrestling TV Review - Episode 68

Courtesy of Larry Goodman:

Showtime Allstar Wrestling – Episode 68
Airing on November 1, 2008 in Nashville on Comcast 74


To view Showtime Allstar Wrestling on the internet click here.

Shawn Shultz was on the phone sweet talking Rachel Worthington with Chrisjen Hayme at his side hanging on every word. Before he hung up, Shultz made a point of asking about Mr. Worthington. Shultz screamed at Hayme for the way things went last week. Shultz said Rachel was not happy that Harley was still running around. “When she’s not happy, her dad’s not happy, and when her dad’s not happy. I’m a little scared. OK?” Shultz told Hayme he needed to listen to him, so they could get rid of Harley.

Cut to Michael St. John and Reno Riggins at ringside. Riggins said the Worthington family was vacationing on their private island in the Caribbean, and daddy wanted Harley gone by the time he got back. MSJ brought up the weirdness of Chris Michaels barring his own valet from ringside.

1 – TJ HARLEY vs. SHAWN SHULTZ (with Chrisjen Hayme)

Shultz caught Harley with a hanging DDT as he came through the ropes. Harley sold like it like he was crippled. As Shultz beat on Harley, Reno talked about Mr. Worthington being all business. He said Hayme appeared to Shultz’s whipping boy. Shultz hit a swinging neckbreaker and pulled Harley up by the hair at two. Hayme made a pest of himself. Shultz finally told him to stay the hell out of it. Harley broke a sleeper hold with a back suplex. Hayme got up on the apron again. Shultz got in Hayme’s face and got rolled up by Harley.

Shultz and Hayme got in a shoving match at ringside. Harley clocked Hayme and Shultz ran away.

WINNER: Harley in 5:20 after problems between Shultz and Hayme. Good story match. Harley can sell.

November 8 is the date for the next huge International Television Taping at the SAW Mill in Millersville.

Commissioner Freddie Morton said Kid Kash crossed the line by using a weapon on a fan last week. Morton said SAW had levied the largest fine in company history against Kash, a fine that Kash had paid in full. Kash was then informed that he was suspended for 30 days. Morton apologized to the viewers and Owen Bain, who suffered a concussion and a laceration “but was otherwise OK.” The cut a quick shot of a bloody Bain.

MSJ and Riggins introed part II of the Reno’s sitdown interview with “Boogie Woogie Boy” Gary Valiant. Riggins said they hadn’t always seen eye to eye, but they were able to work out a compromise to bring Boogie back. Riggins asked Boogie about his return two weeks ago when he came to the aid of Jeff Jamison by attacking Marc Anthony. Boogie said Anthony was a bully that liked to beat up people that weren’t capable of fighting back. “If he wants to be a bully, tell him to bully me around.” Riggins asked Boogies about his intentions in SAW. Boogie said he would take on Anthony any time, and sure, he wanted a shot at the SAW International Title, but what he wanted most was the A-Team.

On November 15 at the SAW Mill, Professional Girls Wrestling Association presents “A Banner Night,” a tribute to the life of Penny Banner featuring PTWA Champion Nikki Roxx (TNA’s Roxie)

Anthony was back with another vignette shot in black & white with “White Rabbit” as the background music. He was in a tiny dressing room.

As I stand here and reminisce about the days when my parents had me locked in that little dark room, and all I had to keep me occupied was to play in my own feces, and swim in my own urine, and listen to the stories…the grand stories of adventure, of princes, fair maidens with long golden locks flowing from their head; fights, wars, bloodshed all around. For you are the only one they couldn’t stop from paying a visit to my little dark room. For I was the little dark secret…There was always a prince chasing after a fair maiden, and wanting to stand in the way of progress. Because they failed to realize, to achieve things in life, sometimes you have to get your hands dirty, Uncle Ronnie. Sometimes you have to do things a little bit behind the back, under the table.

Anthony said SAW finally got themselves a Prince Charming and he brought along a fair maiden.

But if you ask me Uncle Ronnie, I think they need a reality check…no description of a prince was a four inch from being a midget middle-aged man with his hair falling out in droves from the top of his head. Every prince was tall. Every prince was muscular. And every prince could fight the fight. They didn’t dance to a fight. They rode a horse. They had a sword. They had a spear. This Gary Valiant is in dire need of reality check. And as far as his fair maiden goes, she looks more like God grabbed her in a choke hold, and let gravity pull her straight to the ground…They stood their ground, and now we stand ours. I wait for the word.

2 – SIGMON vs. DREW HASKINS

Reno said Sigmon was operating under the delusional belief that he was being “racially profiled” due to his Middle Eastern heritage. MSJ said Sigmon had become almost maniacal in the ring. Haskins got a two count with a diving forearm. Reno said Haskins had asked to train with him this week because he thought he could win this match. Sigmon cheated on the break and hit a high angle back suplex for a near fall. Sigmon attacked Haskins’ back. MSJ said he hadn’t seen a body slam like that since the days of “Fabulous” Jackie Fargo. Haskins’ comeback was chock full of elbows and forearms. Haskins hit a missile dropkick. Instead of covering, Haskins went for another top rope move, and Sigmon caught him with a messed up powerslam. Sigmon with a top rope diving headbutt – “look at that big cranium” - for the three count.

WINNER: Sigmon at 4:56 with the Colossal Camelback Headbutt. Not bad except for that ugly power slam.

Hot Rod Biggs asked Sigmon about his confrontation with Jesse Emerson four weeks ago. Sigmon said it going to be a flag burning, rather it was about seeing what hero would wrap himself. Sigmon challenged Emerson to meet “wrestler extraordinaire” in the ring.

I don’t disrespect your culture, like you do mine. Not you, Hot Rod, you’ve been good to me, but all these people…

Next was a video of Paul Adams in training at the track. It started with Adams doing calisthenics. The music was “Let’s Get Physical.” Adam said Andrews might think the match was funny with his sarcastic remarks, but he was taking it very seriously. Adams was decked out in a “It’s All About Paul” sweatshirt, skimpy electric blue shorts, grey socks and dress shoes. Adams said he cut the sleeves off his t-shirt to accommodate his pythons “kinda Paulverize the shirt”. The tennis shoes weren’t in yet, but he had gone online and ordered them.

You know, not everybody can pull this look off, but luckily, I’ve got the legs to rock a pair of shorts like this.

Adams when Andrews saw the footage of him hanging and banging in the gym next week, and saw what kind of animal he was becoming under the tutelage of Ric Santel, Andrews was going to soil his drawers. Adams flexed for the camera.

Welcome to the gun show, by the way. The beach is that-a-way.

3 – ARRICK ANDREWS vs. TRAVIS SAWYER (with Tony Locasio)

Andrews opened with some crisp work on the arm. Sawyer spun Andrews into a seated position on the middle rope and dropped him with hangman neckbreaker to take over. The announce team was pushing Sawyer hard as the oldest son of Buzz. MSJ said he used a lot of the same moves. Sawyer used a knee drop to the chest for a two count. MSJ said he hadn’t seen that happen to Andrews since he’d been in SAW (?) Sawyer hit a sloppy as hell spinebuster for an “almost” three count. Andrews mounted a comeback. The finish saw Andrews duck a clothesline and pin Sawyer with a tornado kick that didn’t really connect.

WINNER: Andrews in 5:18 with the Dragon’s Curse. Decent match until the last minute or so. I don’t know if Travis is Buzz’s illegitimate son or not, but this guy is a big brawler and nowhere close to the wrestler Buzz was.

Biggs asked a blown up Andrews if he had seen Adams in training. Andrews compared him to Steve Urkel and “Screech” Powers. Andrews abruptly terminated the interview.

4 – CHRIS MICHAELS vs. CHASE STEVENS (with Fallon)

The surprise was Fallon coming out with Stevens. Stevens was tattooing Michaels with punches from the moment he hit the ring. Michaels started after Fallon, but Stevens spun him around and lit him up. Back inside, Stevens got two counts with a vertical suplex and a short arm clothesline, before Michaels blinded him with a big time eye gouge. MSJ said Michaels’ right hand punch was a good as Jerry Lawler’s. Reno said Michael was ambidextrous. Michaels threw Stevens’ headband at Fallon. Michaels pounded Stevens jaw with short lefts sending Stevens down face first. The action moved to ringside with Stevens battling back. Back inside, Stevens hit a snap power slam for a near fall. Michaels used the tights to toss Stevens through the ropes. Michaels tried to suplex Stevens back inside the ring. Stevens escaped and launched a full-fledged comeback leading to a reverse Russian legsweep for a close near fall. Michaels countered a fireman’s carry slam with the Double Shot, and Stevens barely kicked out before the three count. Michaels set up for the superkick. Steven blocked it and hit the fireman’s carry slam. Stevens then splashed Michaels off the top. Sean Casey very gingerly attacked Stevens for the DQ. Tiana was at ringside. Fallon was just standing next to her. Tribal Nation made the save.

WINNER: Stevens via DQ at 7:39 when Sean Casey interfered. Decent match marred by a subpar finish. Casey looked injured to make it work. After they made such a huge deal of Fallon being with Stevens, it was strange to see Fallon and Tiana ignoring each other..

Closing Thoughts: This episode was more about consolidating the stories they’ve been developing than advancing them. Like last week, the talking aspects of the show were stronger than the wrestling. The highlights were the vignettes by Anthony and Adams. Anthony was at his best. Awesome stuff. His use of the Prince Charming parallel with Boogie was brilliant. Adams was hilarious. I say that a lot, but there’s something about his sense of humor that really clicks with me. It made me really want to see the gym session next week. Shultz was entertaining in the opening scene. Boogie did another excellent segment, but making A-Team the clear top priority right off the bat marginalizes his deal with Anthony before they’ve even had a match. They wasted no time tying up the loose end from last week with the suspension of Kash. I laughed out loud when Morton said the fan was OK EXCEPT for a concussion and a laceration. Andrews did himself no favors with the postmatch interview. The matches had unfortunately flawed finishing sequences this week. The opener and the main event told good stories. They again had to work around Worthington’s absence. They’re taking their sweet time turning Hayme, but that’s they way SAW usually unfolds their stories. Fallon with Stevens was nice use of irony. As previously mentioned, the finish took it down several notches and left the show with a lackluster ending.