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Thank You, Axl Rotten (And R.I.P.)

Friday, July 25, 2008

Showtime Allstar Wrestling – Episode 53

Courtesy of Larry Goodman:

Taped June 20, 2008 at the Saw Mill in Millersville, Tn
Airing July 12, 2008 on Comcast 74 in Nashville


Michael St. John and Reno Riggins were at ringside with the big announcement. We have a new SAW International Champion in Kid Kash. Reno was shocked at Kash’s dissection of former champion Damian Adams. We’re going to get Damian vs. Rob Roy McCoy (finally!), as Adams strives to position himself for a title rematch. Sean Casey and Chris Michaels have reunited as High Society to feud with Chase Stevens and Andy Douglas’ replacement, Adam Armor. Shawn Shultz and Miss Worthington are in the house - “that’s gotten weird with TJ Harley.”

New opening. Awesome clips, but I was really fond of the old theme music and the fire.

JERRY LYNN vs. CHRISJEN HAYME

MSJ and Riggins put Lynn over as a great wrestler and a great guy, as well they should have. St. John said St. John said that early in Lynn’s career, Mr. Wrestling II took him under his wing. Early on, Lynn was a step ahead of his far less experience opponent. Lynn hit one of his signature moves- the guillotine legdrop with Hayme’s neck hung over the ropes, but Hayme got his knees up on Lynn’s slingshot splash. Hayme used a gutbuster and worked the body part. Lynn kept kicking out Hayme’s covers at one. St. John claimed that early in Lynn’s career, Mr. Wrestling II took him under his wing. Lynn did a sweet up and over sunset flip for a two count. Hayme cut him off with knee to the gut. Barely a two count. Hayme went for a springboard moonsault and Lynn was ready and waiting with double knees. Lynn was slow to rise because of the damage to his midsection. Lynn hit a series of three spears to soften Hayme up for the TKO.

WINNER: Jerry Lynn with the TKO at 4:33. At 45 years old, Lynn looked terrific and made Hayme look pretty damn good in the process. Nicely put together with Lynn giving Hayme a bigtime taste of his own medicine. The next segment made it clear why Lynn went over on a guy that had been getting a push.

MSJ was at ringside with Kash. St. John asked him if his title win was tainted by the damage McCoy had done to Adams the week before. Kash said who cares. Kash said SAW’s big mistake was bringing Kash in and putting “the little idiot” in the ring with him. Hearty “Kash sucks” chant from the crowd. Kash said he wasn’t some journeyman boy just happy to get a shot on TV. Kash ran down his title credentials from ECW, WCW, TNA, NWA and WWE. Lynn came out holding his midsection. Kash said Lynn should be in the back toweling off. Lynn said being champion meant putting the title up anytime, anywhere against anybody.

You would think after all these years, you would have learned something. It just goes to show you, you’re still the same horse’s ass as ever…I can’t see a better time or place than right now, so why don’t we give these people what they want to see?

That pissed Kash off. He said Lynn just about got his brains beat in by a little rookie nobody ever heard of. Kash started to climb into the ring. Lynn was first through the ropes. Kash then jumped back off the apron. Kash said he would beat Lynn right now but that would be unfair of a true champion, because Lynn was too winded from his match, and he wanted him at his best. Besides, he had a big date in one hour and Lynn wasn’t worth all of that.

Any place, any time, Jerry Lynn, except right now…You better go watch some old videotapes. This is not the same Kid Kash of old. This is a new one. I will beat you to death, Jerry Lynn.

HIGH SOCIETY (Sean Casey & Chris Michaels with the Freak Squad) vs. CHASE STEVENS & ADAM ARMOR.

Armor and Stevens right to work on the arm of Casey. They hit a facebuster/lariat combo, and Casey escaped to his corner with a rake of the eyes. Michaels was in for more of the same from Stevens, including a Fujiwara armbar. The commentary focused on High Society’s suspected physical abuse of Freak Squad member Fallon as a distraction for Stevens and Armor. At 4:00, Armor appeared to blow out his knee on a leapfrog attempt. High Society was all over the knee with double teaming chicanery. Riggins said Armor’s medical report stated he had a knee problem. Armor started a comeback on one leg and got caught by Casey’s middle rope diamond cutter. Stevens was in to break up the pin. A High Society combo move concluded with a Casey spinebuster for a near fall. Reno said teaming with his old partner from OVW had rejuvenated Casey. Armor rolled away from Casey’s middle rope elbow drop and went through the legs for the tag. Steven with fists of fire and clubbing lariats. With ref Kurt Heron out of the ring checking on Armor, Stevens and Casey collided midring. Michaels ordered Fallon to give him her boot and grabbed her by hair when she wasn’t ready with the goods. Michaels got a high-heeled boot from “little (?) Lexi Pillman” and clocked Stevens with it for the 1-2-3. Michaels did some very close range screaming at Fallon for not being on the same page with him.

WINNERS: High Society at 10:05. Solid match. This program is a step up in class for Armor, and the match was put together to avoid the possibility of overexposing him. The jury is still out on the domestic violence angle.

The bumper featured the talking head of Rob Roy McCoy. “…I slapped on the chickenwing. I heard the ligaments and the tendons and bones crushing and grinding. Now you may tell everybody that you’re 100%, but I know different. I know that I am the reason you’re no longer the champion. You may not have that belt any more, but it doesn’t matter, because I’m going to finish off what I started, once and for all.”

The camera panned across an army of toy soldiers. Their battlefield was a bathroom sink and the top of a toilet tank. There were even a few standing on the toilet paper roll. “White Rabbit” was playing in the background. Cut to newsreel footage from the frontlines of World War II. Cut to our first look at Mark Anthony. He was on his knees in front of the toilet wearing an army helmet and a camouflage singlet. Anthony addressed his “men.”

Gentleman! No one in the history of mankind has seen a war like the war I am about to start. And Uncle Ronnie P. said. He said you’ve got to train ‘em now, boy. We’re going to have to train, gentleman, because we’re going to have to endure weather. We’re going to endure hardships, like we’ve never endured before. And I’m going to lead by example, gentleman. Because when you’re in a war, and there’s no deer to kill; there’s no squirrel to kill. We have no dinner. We have to make do.

Anthony removed his helmet, set down his weapon (a toilet plunger), and placed his hands on the toilet bowl.

By Uncle Ronnie P, I’m going to set the example right here. Gentleman, I found something that no normal man would dare try. I’m going to feed you, gentleman. I’m going to get you the nutrients that you need to keep marching on. Just take a look.

Anthony plunged his head into the toilet bowl and stuffed the lumpy, brown contents into his mouth. The screen went black. We heard Anthony’s trademark barking.

SIGMON vs. JESSE EMERSON

MSJ said the ref (Jess Fields) was Harry Potter. Reno said Emerson favored Christian Cage except he looked like he actually went to the gym. Emerson gave Sigmon a high back drop for a near fall. But Sigmon didn’t fall for the up and over move, and hit a reverse DDT to take over. Sigmon got great elevation on a dropkick. MSJ said he had heard rumors of Sigmon’s “Middle Eastern orientation.” Sigmon missed with a diving headbutt. Emerson made his comeback. Emerson tried for an Alabama Slam, but Sigmon grabbed the ropes. Emerson elevated Sigmon, who ended up going over the ropes. I don’t think that was the plan. Emerson made a mad dash into the corner, and Sigmon rolled him up with a fistful of tights.

WINNER: Sigmon at 3:50. Decent match. Both guys show promise but need personality. It was Sigmon’s first win on SAW TV. Looks like they’re toying with the idea of an Arab heel character for him.

SHAWN SHULTZ (with Rachel Worthington) vs. TATSU

Shultz beat on Tatsu right from the opening bell. Riggins said the 10K bounty Shultz earned by putting TJ Harley out of action must have come in handy, especially in this economy. He said Miss Worthington hailed from Bellemeade Boulevard, one of the richest streets in America. Shultz planted Tatsu with a DDT.

Before getting comments from Shultz and Worthington, MSJ cut to a video from TJ Harley. Harley was doing bicep curls with a photo of Miss Worthington taped to the mirror for motivation. Harley said he had suffered another concussion, but he was coming back next week regardless of the doctor’s advice. “Rachel you’re one of the worst things that ever happened to me, the worst thing in my life. But you know something? Next week at SAW, I will be the worst thing that ever happened to you.” Cut to ringside, where Shultz was in the midst of a full blown panic attack. Worthington gave Shultz the talk-to-the-hand treatment. She told him she wanted all of daddy’s money back if Harley was there next week. Shultz said the money was all spent.

WINNER: Shultz squashed in 1:54 with a DDT. I’m liking this angle a lot. Worthington, looking even hotter than in her debut, was surprisingly good here.

Bumper with Adams promo: Adams said he was going to show McCoy why he one of the greatest SAW champions ever, and he was making him into a stepping stone back to the International title. Español finish.

SAW Summary: St. John narrated clips showing the history between McCoy and Adams.

ROB ROY MCCOY vs. DAMIAN ADAMS

The announce team brought up the fact that McCoy was finally getting Adams but minus the title shot he coveted. A back and forth chain wrestling exchange saw Adams come out on top, as McCoy was unsuccessful in his attempt to hook him with the chickenwing. Riggins talked about how Adams had been running the gauntlet in recent weeks and may not be at 100%. McCoy stunned a charging Adams with a back elbow and gave him a hotshot on the top turnbuckle. McCoy started working the neck he injured during the attack on Adams two weeks ago. McCoy hit a spinning neckbreaker that had Adams clutching his neck as he kicked out. When McCoy missed with a big elbow drop, Adams launched a comeback with a series of left jabs, a big right, and a Polish Hammer. Adams went for the bicycle kick. McCoy blocked it and tried for the chickenwing, but Adams escaped. Adams hit the bicycle kick and McCoy tumbled into ref Kurt Herron. Adams scored a visual fall, as Herron grabbed his aching tummy. Adams helped Herron to his feet, giving McCoy time to recover. Adams tried to fight it, but McCoy locked in the chickenwing. Big “Damian” chant from the crowd. Adams passed out rather than tapping. Herron called for the bell. The crowd went dead quiet, just as they did when Kash beat Adams last week.

WINNER: McCoy via submission at 5:59 with the chickenwing. Match told a good story. The work was crisp except for the ref bump, which looked like crap. By all rights, it should have had a dramatic, visually compelling finish. There was no struggle by Adams once they were on the mat. Herron didn’t even do the three arm drop thing before calling for the bell.

McCoy refused to relinquish the hold on the unconscious Adams. Herron was joined by second ref Fields, Emerson and Drew Haskins in an effort to pry Adam free. The announce team hammered home the point that Adams never tapped. It took a massive effort to forced McCoy to release his vise-like grip. As Adams slowly began to come around, Reno wondered about the extent of Adams’ injuries. The show closed with the crowd chanting “Damian” for the former champion.

Closing Thoughts: This episode continued the recent string of high-quality shows.